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underneath the stars
I'll self-reflect... in this small world of lastman-standing.BS.com

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DISCLAIMER: If you find anything offensive in or about this blog remember that this blog is solely for MY entertainment, not YOURS. What I write in this blog, you have a choice to read it. I can't hide things in small spoiler tags just for you. It's for my convenience. Whether this blog entertains you or not, i couldn't care less. Only one request: spammers GO AWAY and stop tagging nonsense or start flaming by means of the tagboard. This is my blog, not your altar. I don't need your reverence or worship, neither does this blog, I'm sure of it.

Read on.
Monday, June 30, 2008
6:16 AM

wow. (with a nasal sound)

my new favourite word for now.

started during physics. i just randomly said it. and found it amusing. so i used it to irritate chinkiat and ivan.

today was more or less a 'science day'.
science all the way lah. please.
physics lecture
physics lesson
sciences tuition

damn sian, can.
finished EVERYTHING at around 7.30

bought drinks, then crossed road by bridge (i could have sworn i almost screamed when i slipped and almost fell on the bridge.

i'll never cross bridges again!
not till i get over the incident. i always was afraid of bridges
but this was terrible.

ergh.
ergh.

and i learned a new Cantonese phrase today! see my PM if you can, while you still can. it's becoming more vulgar by the minute.

and, HAPPY BIRTHDAY FIONA

if she didn't receive me and kiat's msg.
bcos he smsed her old no. what an idiot.

it was
hey. happy...


and kiat was supposed to say ...birthday.

but it failed, thanks to him.

lols



oh, well.


3 birthdays coming up in the next 3 days.



and my FREE SMSES come tmr!
really can't wait.






~BenjaminTAN


Saturday, June 28, 2008
10:26 PM

right.
yesterday was supposed to be an enjoyable day.
SUPPOSED, god dammit.
until after band.

**** him lah. what the hell's his problem? What i do is near none of his business god dammit. i also didn't ask him to come fetch me, too. i didn't ask for anything, if he's angry at the school, he also shouldn't take it out on me, right? i, of all people never did any wrong to him, **** it. he doesn't understand me, that idiot. all he does is hope i'll do my homework.

I really can't take it anymore lah. Please. tired, and irritated from band. this is what i deserve, issit? maybe i shouldn't even ****ing come for band lah. may as well go out and not see your **** face.

I don't need your help, you hear? I really don't. i don't DESERVE your help, since i'm so inferior to you. i don't care if there's a difference between you. it's not my fault, you shouldn't take it out on me. Because i also don't want to go anywhere. Maybe to hell. **** it, i really don't care.

failure of mankind.

scram.
get lost.
buzz off. i don't need you.



if you see "****" it means the f-word. i don't want to see dirty stuff splashed on my blog, you see. especially by me.



Ignore my rants, please. It's not worth reading, first of all, you wouldn't understand it.
and i'm really not going to tell you who that person is. it's kinda obvious.


~BenjaminTAN


Friday, June 27, 2008
5:19 AM

i have a confession to make.

but i'll do that later.
for now, please, welcome the HOD of teh Science Department, Mr. Tan, who counts in tens, not ones.

he asked me to run a hundred rounds around the chem lab, simply i didn't have the notes. Because, i forgot my asknlearn password. and i forgot to photocopy. blame it on my forgetfulness.

so i ran ten, and he asked both me and nigel to stop. (nigel ran 22)

english was interesting. oral practice, for the whole class to hear. harden your head and skin, and do the conversation topic with no shame. i did, and i got a perfect score, 5/5, for thinking about the topic for a second, and talking for more than a minute.

and i'd like to say this:
i'm an english-speaking person. Rarely would any person hear me converse in mandarin.
i speak more hokkien than mandarin. but no more of that.
i speak eng, and it affects my results in this way:

eng marks is lower than chinese marks
eng oral marks is higher than chinese oral marks

do i really need to speak mandarin? for the sole purpose of pulling up my L1, and to get a nice B grade for Chinese for my 'O's? if so, so be it, and i'm serious.
END OF DISCUSSION

so i had recess, e maths (vectors, BORING vectors test) and chinese. i had fun during chinese.
tested clement on his conversational skillz (near negligible) and had a really nice discussion about our life (more about clement's passion for martial arts), till schoo ended, and i found out that i didn't need to stay back for any chinese supplementary classes, so i went out for lunch with gab, adam, joel, darrel, kai wei and joe, i think. after getting consent from my mum, that is.

so we went to katong shopping centre to eat.
then i entered the Home of Pool.

this, is where my confession starts.
ignore it while you still can.


i entered a LAN shop, and played one kill of Half-life 2 on the computer.

then i left.
this, is where my confession ends.
like i said, ignore it, it's no use finding out, anyway. i didn't commit some crime, i just entered a place where most (gaming)TKsians enter, and it was my first time.

so i took bus 10 and 2 back home, where i slacked, ate, and blogged.




~BenjaminTAN


Thursday, June 26, 2008
6:12 AM

although i've not been blogging for a few days now, i have nothing to say.

really.

it's a new start, new semester, but i can't find the correct words to say it.
and for those who noticed why i'll not blog as frequently, it's just this word: school.


It's not an excuse, just a word. a reason. it's Sec 4 now, and i have to kinda catch up on my studies again. even homework seems fun, you know. you should try it some time.

and my DSA Autition's on ID4! lols

hmm.
i'll just briefly explain what happened today.

first period, ms. mildred yap told us about the SGC thing.
then chem.
then phy.
RECESS
Chinese, did our own 'bao zhang bao dao' kind of thing.
did i tell you i got a pathetic 13/30 for my conversation topic when ms low called me out for some training?
i suck.
nid MORE chinese conversation. please.

then, had A Maths.
i thought it was E maths, dammit. got a scolding from ms chen.

photocopied my report book.
had SS (sleeping session), then school mercifully ended.
for the lower sec, that is.

i had a math supplementary, with mr. kang.
then went home
tuition
went to do my ezlink stuff
then went back home.


Roughly like that lah.
my mind's blank




~BenjaminTAN


Saturday, June 21, 2008
5:11 AM

went to some shopping mall yesterday (why can't i remember the name?) to eat dinner and watch the Hulk with my family. quite uneventful, just that i liked the movie, although it's a bit short.

Now, for my self-reflection.
this month, i've collected a few memories and decided to dump it all here.

Look at this statement.
"The most suitable person to ask for the time would be a typical working Singaporean man."

now, why'd i say that?
i learnt it from one of my tuition, during some random chats with my teacher and classmates.
he said his watch is the most accurate, in Singapore, that is, because he sets it according to ERP time.
now, think about that, going side-by-side with the previous statement in quotes.

and second, this holidays are simply put the most boring holidays EVER.
First, because band kinda has no meaning to me. i'm doing nothing but odd jobs, to supervise the flags, take the umbrellas, and whatever. I decided that I'm not part of the show, which in return drags me far from the band. whatever i try to do to narrow the gap just helps to widen the gap more, to the extent that i can just say "screw it" and just quit the band altogether. There's just no sense to it all.
Yet, i still turn up for practices.
Maybe it is the result of absolute boredom.
Maybe it is the result of my need to escape from my absolute boredom.
second, i've got myself addicted to messaging by phone, when i burst the 500 free sms limit, i look at myself and say "why have i nothing to do?"
ergh. i still adapted to the "no sms" condition, and did A BIT of work.

third, for those who realised why i'm sleepy and yawn at every single thing in this world, it's not as if i haven't got enough sleep. i have.

lastly, my grandmother just came back from surgery.
can't explain it here. DON'T FEEL LIKE IT.
then thinking about her in a hospital would be the cause of me in emo these few days, maybe quite speechless, staring at the rain for no reason. it drags past memories to the present, i have nightmares during the night, extreme exhaustion during the night, and my brother now complains that i talk in my sleep. again.
sighs
can't help it. it just links my whole life together, and just when i'm about to live on, the words "Chinese New Year" float back to the concentration bit of my brain, and i think too much about it.

i think too much about it, god damn it.

i think i've changed during this holidays, and i'm serious. attitude-wise, character-wise. i've been a bit gangster-like at home in the afternoon. recently, i screamed at my mum for no reason. Even after apologising and some forgiveness i just cannot fathom my change of attitude during these few weeks. Indifference, laziness, everything bad in sec 2 gets raked up from the graveyard soil and gets integrated into my character.
i need an end to this, and i mean it. without help i may just torture myself again, just like old times (sec 2), and i don't want that to happen.

For those who see the change in me, i really apologise for my aggression, my hostility, and whatever.

I need to forget.
maybe, sometimes, it's really better to forget.
it may just lead to my insanity.
I NEED AN ESCAPE FROM THIS MAD WORLD

please. help me.


~BenjaminTAN


P.S.: my Cortana run's out in HSH


Thursday, June 19, 2008
1:09 AM

yesterday's band camp was....
interesting.

we finally got to see the 'guru' as quoted by Mr. Siao. Young, but experienced. I didn't think he'd be that thin. Neither did i think he'd wear spectacles. I also didn't think he'd have an accent.

He was nothing that i thought he'd be, but ONE thing came out correctly: he was GOOD.

learnt the DCI marching style in the morning, let him see the different formations in the afternoon, and practiced till evening. I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY SEC 4'S CANNOT SLEEP OVER!!! i seriously don't get it.
wouldn't it save us the travel cost? sure, we'd find our breakfast and dinner by ourselves, that's for sure, but i don't see the point of us not staying over.

i mean, it's not as if we'd STUDY our socks off when we reach home. i mean, it's just a frigging 2-night stay, what's the big deal?
never mind.

i was awakened from my sleep very 'rudely' by my jie. That's what she does. was tired, maybe because i ate nothing before chasing a bus for 3 stops, and vomiting in the bus. (Yesterday)

Now, i'm not so in a good mood as i was before. Didn't really feel like blogging, but then, i'd have nothing to do other than sleep.


Now, hear this sentence out: "i have nothing to say."

now, that's wrong.




I'm just bored.
Study kills.
So does band.
Maybe i should do nothing and just stare at the computer screen.








~BenjaminTAN


Monday, June 16, 2008
4:34 AM

MOAR PICS FROM THE 14th OF JUNE!!!
(during camwhore session, but not so, since it's only a few)


For starters, at home:

Pay your respects, bitches! (jk)



First glance, you see only me and Jia.
Second glance, you see me, Jia, and labels on the table.
Third Glance, (go look at the labels yourself lah)



More solo shots:


if you're as blind as i am when wearing those spectacles, you'll not recognise those spectaclse as unfamiliar, UNLESS you've seen Claire in it.
imagine me saying, "Hello, sir. I'm selling insurance, sir."
i did that behind my mum.
she freaked out when i called "Mrs. Tan, ....."



me, jie, and leinad (not prepared yet)


now he's ready.


random shot...

now, get ready..... for the "Boy-Band", consisting of Nick, Jia, Yang, me, and Leinad.


(at attention)
nick, jia and yang look as if they went on vacation


we were pointing to the Exit sign, but my jie didn't capture that


grabbing the railing, and each other's heads. I finally know that leinad's taller than me


emo.....


we're tired! can't you give us a break?
so...


we sat on a chair.
Featuring the guest 'player' in the Boy-Band: Liagiba


and so concluded the cam-whoring session.








WOW. the wireless network's lagging so badly, i'm typing each sentence even before the pic starts uploading. and i'm typing this as the last picture uploads.

Haiz.

Shall end the post here.



~BenjaminTAN


1:29 AM

today's another unevenful day.
woke up at 9.45. Quite unexpected, seeing that i lacked about a day's worth of sleep. ate. whatever. i kinda forgot again. must be the lack of sleep.

and in the morning i took out the Halo 3 disc and started playing. then some thought hit me. 'mayb i should try to drive an Anti-Air Wraith. So, i did it mostly by trial and error, and a small little tutorial at HIH, so to those at HIH, thank you.

Time for my own Tutorial. For those who're not interested in Halo 3, please skip this bit.

For starters, you can use a PP to EMP the AA wraith, then get on.
Box off the lid that hides the driver from the outside world.
Box off his shields.
Now, duck at a spot just a bit south-east/west away from the hole which hid the driver, till you boxed off the lid. Make sure that there are no prompts to board the enemy wraith.
Make sure you don't move, or a prompt might appear.
Shoot the driver and hold RB (just do it, altho there's no prompt) so when he dies, you will get on the wraith immediately.

A relatively simple procedure, actually.
as you get better at it there'll be no need to use the PP.


So, for those who're not interested, i'm now back on topic. Care to stay on board with me?

so.
lunch was leftovers again.
slacked the whole afternoon.
then here i am.

and i have a confession to make.



I'm an addict.
having just exceeded my 500 free smses, i feel bored.
think about it
maybe i need to do a bit of self-reflection.

Haiz.


~BenjaminTAN


Saturday, June 14, 2008
7:49 PM

the 44th post of lastman-standing.blogspot.com shall cover 3 days.

(look at the temperature of the car.)

this was on friday:
nothing much, just that i went for piano lesson at plaza singapura at 3. and at the yamaha school at the second-highest level(dunno which level larh) i saw a marching french horn.
it looks...

i saw it coming. i knew it'd be as weird as how it looks like in the photo. and i know i wouldn't want to march with that. and i know that my section'd second my thoughts here.

oh, well.
at 4 my bro came to plaza to go to nai nai's house for STAYOVER, woots.
in home clothes and a cap.
i wish he'd let me take a pic of him.
then we went kfc to buy some food. he had no breakfast and lunch.
then we went to starbucks (i stayed outside) to buy coffee. my brother, that is. i never liked coffee. bitter and whatever.
from the busstop nearest to plaza sing, we took 124 all the way to the henderson bridge (which was like mayb a kilometre off the ground, i dunno. if someone fell off he'd have a lot of air time) because my mum asked me to. and asked me and leinad to walk into the telok blangah heights. turns out she was wrong to have said that, and i was wrong to believe that. because.

124 turns straight into telok blangah heights.

but we didn't care. we took 273 into the road. i couldn't care much. my bus pass was still valid. leinad, however, wasted 55 more cents. his ezlink card had no money.
maybe i should phrase it to 'i wasted 55 more cents' because the coins came from my wallet.

whatever.
we went to nai nai's house, to find that nick, jia and yang hadn't even arrived. they arrived at 6, sweaty and all. then simin arrived. earlier than them, just to eat dinner with us. lols. with her mum, since nainai's going to cook for all of us.

after dinner, my aunt woke up from her sleep. and came out fro the room, giving the 5 of us all the time we wanted on the xbox. however, we could only play till 10, the maid required sleep.

WARNING: to those who're not used to seeing skinny people who bo cheng sah (never wear shirt) , please scroll down and close your eyes

jia(left) and yang(right)

parteh! nick's the one nearest to the camera.


need i say more? me and jia


we were bored, to cut a long story short

and did i tell you jia wore a blue FBT shorts?! the one that the netballers usually wear.

well, that was all.

for playing, that is.
because i slept at 3.30. jia was scratching his body all over (his hobby). damn noisy. and i had to shift out of my comfortable position to pull my blanket up, took about 30 mins to adapt and adjust.
and i teng sah and kor (if you dunno, it's a blessing; it's in hokkien, btw)
because it was just so warm under the blanket, and just so cold without the blanket.
then i slept.

woke up at 5.30, for GOD KNOWS WHAT REASON. i really dunno. that's how ppl wake up from a nice sleep.

lay in till 6, when everybody woke up. bathed in supersuper shiok hot water, then we had to leave.

for da gu's house, which was also in telok blangah, required a 5-min drive from my nainai's place.
and my da gu zhang fetched us all to his house. quite a few ppl were there already, and we just went in to take a look at shawn.
hmm.
i dunno how to say. in home clothes, yet had her make-up put on. it was a weird sight.

at around (forgot the time, i think around 0730-0800) steven arrived, and everybody was there already. locked up the place, we left, and went downstairs.
nick's finest moment (opening the door for steven) and receiving a 20-buck red packet in return. haiz. if only i was born bedore 9 july. haiz again.

went up, and from the games began.
he had to look for a plastic bag, which contained a pink bra and a sash which showed "bride-to-be" and he had to put it on.
pics, 2 of them, damn. the rest were videos.

bra...

and sash.

after that he had to learn on the spot how to play 'twinkle twinkle little star' on the violin, thanks to my jie. he picked up pretty fast, i had to say.
after much ear-bleeding time, we got to go in.
then more games began
he had to sing a chinese song and an english song.
2 english songs, and one chinese song, to be exact.
the chinese song was sung by his brothers and him (tian mi mi)
and he sang 'twinkle twinkle little star' with improvisation ("twinkle twinkle little star, you are brighter than a star" was his last 2 lines)
and another eng song.

FINALLY, the door opened.

FINALLY, the house was quiet (15 mins later)
then the 5 of us plus matthew (jennifer's bf) went to the bukit merah macs to eat some proper breakfast.
after eating, we went back.
and...
jia slept.

how peaceful he was.

then we did a lot of stuff, played cards, ate lunch, tea ceremony, played more cards, socialised, and whatever before we went home.

AND, for those who don't even know, shawn's my cousin. on my father's side. i've got a lot of cousins, due to the fact that...
my father has 7 siblings, not including himself.

went home, slept, ate, bathed, played piano, dressed up (though not in chronological order)

and there you go.

i wouldn't be surprised when ppl go "WTF?!" at this because i only wore this for 3 occasions.

then we went for the dinner.
me, jie and leinad had to play piano at the reception, but i think nobody heard; they were talking too loudly.
but, i think they heard my Gershwin piece, since the starting was quite loud.
finally, we could get in.
(pictures and videos will be shown later, as in last part of this post)
ate dinner.
superb, i say.
wonderful, i say.
non-filling, i say.
that's the catch.
there were 10 ppl at my table. including me.
so i just ate.
then in between meals we cam-whored. i had to say, it was quite an experience.

whatever.
reached home at around 12.30. slept at 1.

to end it off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GABRIEL!

now for the pics. slowly synchronising with jie via msn.
all pics not taken by my camera's going up below.

you know what...
i'll edit.
stupid jie's offline now






bye. For now.
~BenjaminTAN


Tuesday, June 10, 2008
8:39 PM

this post is requested by elise.


got another chatting record.
14 hours.
on monday. from 9 to 11.
won't elaborate on it, you probably know who the other party is.

yesterday's band was... quite meaningful, in the sense that... it was meaningful lah.
interesting too.

started with morning. woke up at 6.30. got the 7.10 bus, till the end of haig road. strolled down haig road, took 10 minutes, then went to school. and i thought i was early.
elise and kaini reached school at 7.30, only to practice steps! it's like, i don't really see the point of practicing steps. if you memorised the steps, when you get on the field you'd get it all correct what... but there they were. goes to show that they didn't do it at home. lols.....

band started at the same time.
i was hoping there was sectionals, but there wasn't. damn. we went for combined, BORING combined, and those media ppl arrived again. DAMN irritating, can. like leeches. worse than leeches. asked us to do some outdoor for them to see and shoot. so weirui had to go on the field, for the first time. quite good lah. his gimmicks improved.

then we had lunch.
at kfc, thank god the 16 bus driver saw us flagging. then we went.
with weirui. isabel disappeared halfway. dunno where she went to. joined us halfway at kfc. jsut when nadia went off. disappeared too. ya. for the first time i ate so slowly! at kfc, that is. my slowest was when... i was sick. ya.

then afternoon practice. in the hall.
then field all the way.
i followed ian to see the marching baritone, and that took only a minute. when i went to the field the first thing i heard was 'benjamin i miss you'.........
.....
.....
.....
then did formations here and again.

when everything ended, i realised i had no time to rush back for tuition at tampines, and it starts at 8. so ivan's dad fetched me home (thanks, uncle) and i bathed, ate, slacked, b4 mum fetched me for tuition.


tuition was another normal lesson, only that the teacher told us 2 stories.

WARNING: MAY FRIGHTEN YOU.
he has a nephew. nephew has an imaginary friend.
like to play together.
then one time teacher's sister asked her son why the friend never do prayers together. the son said, "how to pray? he has no head."

second story:
his friend's daughter has an imaginary friend.
everything must do together.
bathe, eat, sleep, read, play, go in/out/up/down must wait fot the friend.

so of course very ma fan for the mother lah
then one night the mother and daughter were on a taxi at siglap.
stopped at a red light.
then daughter asked if can open door.
mother said why?
daughter said...
















friend needs to go out.


so the mum was surprised. they were inseparable, so it was quite unusual.
then she looked out and saw...
















the siglap cemetery.






ok. end of post.
hope you like it (the story)


and elise! i'm still waiting for update!

~BenjaminTAN


Monday, June 9, 2008
1:12 AM

today: one of the many days that i spend at home.
i can never imagine how others spend more time out than at home.
i mean, what's the point? may as well just do some work, slack or sleep, or just play the whole day. That's what a home is for. not jsut a place for lodging or whatever, but to have fun too.
all right, that's way out-of-point.

So...
woke up at 8. saw that daniel and jie already left the house. and so had dad. listened to music, and watched a few videos. till i found out that mum had left the house to fetch my mei to school. then i went upstairs to play N3 and GOW. actually, GOW first, then N3. i sucked at gow already lah! play casual ("you enjoy the occasional shooter" so they say, and it's the easiest difficulty ever) and i can die every checkpoint 2 times at least! i was so frustrated with myself, i switched disks, and played N3. that was at 10.30.

played till 12, then my mum asked me to go out with her. to go woodlands, since nobody'd be at home. luckily i saw no point in going from east to north, or i'd die of boredom in the car. i called leinad and asked him to buy some lunch for me (lols).

played more and more till i got bored, and used the comp. chatted on msn till my bro came back. with a 6-dollar Subway sandwich. he's mad. i dunno how he has that kind of money. but no matter. it tasted delicious. tuna and some meat. i think it's chicken. ate on the third level, heehee, and after that continued to chat till i had to reboot my comp bcos it lagged REAL BADLY. Reboot as in from the powerpoint switch. i know it's bad, but i had to get it working again. it booted fairly fast.

and i started chatting again. and playing again.

hmm.

i think that's all.

and elise wants me to teach her piano!! lols


~BenjaminTAN


Saturday, June 7, 2008
11:40 PM

today's a Sunday.
yet i'm posting about yesterday's band practice =.=
ya. i was bored yesterday, but also too bored to blog, so here i am.


yesterday's band practice started at 9, and i arrived at 8.20 or somewhere near that time. Went to put back my mouthpiece in the horn case, then thought better of it. i now have no horn. mine's with wenhui. so when i dsa i need to see that horn fixed, and i have to bring it all the way to mjc. sianzzzz.

ya. so i went back to the bag room to put my bag.
and i played the piano all the way till fall in time.
first, we went for sectionals. due to the fact that i'm not going for the trip, and did not have to memorise anything, i went to take the sec 1's. with firza.
took an outdoor snare drum to do the timings and stuff. we were lazy to clap. and we did it till (i dunno what time) and the main band went for combined (it was raining) and me and ian took weirui for sectionals. indoor sectionals. since i'm not involved in anything, i didn't follow te rest up, but stayed with ian to take weirui to play the horn.

he took my single horn. the exact same one that i used for the '06 outdoor. now i feel it's VERY difficult to play. taught the buzzing technique first, then trying to vary pitch with frequency of buzzing. he kinda got the idea. and i think he was much better than me when i was in sec 1.

couldn't even pitch the 3rd note in the B flat scale a few months before the indoor concert.

derrrrr.
i sucked at sec 1 and sec 2 before comp
sec 3 i loved my way of playing the horn. was my best and funn-est year. i felt i could do anything.

ya. after then, went to the studio for some combined. and there was some crap media thing that wasted my time. was so hungry lah.

then went for lunch with section.
the damn 16 bus driver had some thing stuck in his eyes?! he didn't see the whole busstop flagging for the damn bus?
he just whizzed by, splashing water on us that the rain deposited on the cracks and crevices in the road, further irritating us.
so we went to lucky bread. ate 2 bowl noodles and one cup of milk tea.
and i wasn't even full. damn.

but we walked back to the school again, and i went to the second tier to chat with alan. in hokkien. turns out that i speak less hokkien than i hear. alan must've spoken more hokkien than he hears, get what i mean? ;)

fall in.
got weirui to take his instrument. the same single horn.
trained him till the end of band practice. filled in a piece of paper full of my steps.
and he asked minimal questions. and nothing else.
so i think he'd fare quite well.
but i don't want just well.
i want excellent. so i'd be expecting much from you, weirui.

then i went home for dinner and stuff.
bathed.
went online
congratulated kaini for taking F5
and chatted.
and slept.


woke up today at 9.
quite early, considering i had no tuition and i could wake up whatever time i wanted to.
watched by bro maple.
played N3 on the 360 myself. i'm getting to like that game again.

had yesterday's leftovers for lunch.

then i'm online now.
and helping elise with some online math thing.




~BenjaminTAN


Friday, June 6, 2008
4:45 AM






today was, simply put, one interesting day.
especially in the afternoon.
lessons were boring as usual.
just like any other day.
...
and during the final break, gabriel and chin kiat were talking about the Tj DSA's today. sure, i've heard of it from nicholas only yesterday. and i decided to postpone my piano lesson to try out the DSAs.
so, in the afternoon we practiced 1 to 2 songs in the studio. and i recently let chin kiat hear the "Second Suite in F" and there was a eupho solo, and he decided to play it.
although he reveived the score from his TKG friend. a few minutes before we left (i told him TKG did play it before, that's why he asked for it).
and yug han decided to play Godspeed at the slow part, i think bar 55, with Reverence till the end of the slow part.
and i haven't even decided what to play.
it was only when we entered the TJ school gate, when gabriel started talking about the first suite on Eb and i decided to play an excerpt from it.
then, came the practicing.
i asked nicholas for a horn, chin kiat for a eupho, gab for an alto sax and yug han for a double bass.
lol.
then i started practicing.
nicholas apparently was an important figure in the DSA part, so i asked yug han what post he got and he said President and Horn SL.
sick seh.
...
and i tried nicholas's mouthpiece. it was so good, much better than the one i had.
jit rui looked at chin kiat's results, and asked for his class.
"4E"
"wah! you make 4E lose face leh! i was from the E class. better buck up" or something like that.
finally, we entered the band room
so damn messy.
the previous horn sl asked me to play the B flat scale, 2 octaves.
i screwed the second><>


horn, sax and eupho.
yug han, and his 'indifferent' face, bcos i took two pictures of him. look below.
...need i say more?
and somemore 'indifferent' faces to the camera. I present kiat on the left, gab on the right (if you didn't know.
gab was looking at yug han, whiole kiat ignored the camera.
random, but hey, 117! those who play Halo get me, although gab didn't.




ok then,
~BenjaminTAN


Thursday, June 5, 2008
6:07 AM

wow.
k^4 went for MJC soccer tryouts.
said he got rejected.
i wonder why.
he's just so damn good.
or mayb MJ's criteria is much higher?
i really dunno
but to reject someone like him is equal to a sick person chasing away the family physician.
hope you all get the analogy.
(btw: MJC's soccer boy's the best in SG)

mayb i'm a bit too extreme, but, please! i can see kenneth is such a good player.

cheer up ken, if my DSA fails we'll go in together using our merits and appeal. MAYBE.


today was lesson
due to his tryouts, ken didn't turn up for school.
but i don't care.
i wish he and i had swapped positions.
SCHOOL TODAY WAS SO BORING!!
english, did summary. actually ok lor. till i found out i was kinda breathing harder after some time. the audi was stuffy.
and hot. worse than the chinese's one.

so we went to the lecture room.
and finished the summary.

now, for a bit of chem.
just like yesterday, it was boring. for once. actually, i'll let it be 'twice'
actually not boring, but very monotonous. esp w mrs tey.

then i went to look at my section during the break. (i forgot to collect my allowance from my mum, so i had no money come the second break; if i had money i wouldn't have cared less about even glancing at my section. I WAS SO HUNGRY then!)
2 ppl from auxi came to horns.
(forgot her name), and weirui.
.....

another short one was posted to horns, and KEVIN!
please! comeon! you gotta be kidding me, right? the tk band doesn't take in spoilt brats like michael, dammit! you change or you go. ergh.

then... a maths.
i felt like sleeping.

forgot what happened in the afternoon, bcos i think i was napping.
so tired.

okay, shall end my nonsense here.


~BenjaminTAN


Wednesday, June 4, 2008
2:50 AM

yesterday: band day.
dunno what happened in class that day, but who cares.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAGDISH & XIAO JIA
ya, since sec 1 i realised they share the same birthdays, i know it's 3rd of somemonth. today, i finally know their birthdays.

shannon phua sprained his ankle, and FAIZAN SPRAINED HIS NECK! someone said he tried to do a headspin. his nose must have bumped into something and stopped his spin. either that or he's just acting stupid. sorry, did i say acting stupid? cancel off the 'acting'. and he still wants to play basketball. the next thing he's gonna do is twist his nose.

band was... to put it simply, not as interesting as i thought it to be. Again.
mr. siao took us for the whole day, and i realised one song he asked us to play had the Rhapsody in Blue in it. he said it was fusion of Rachmaninoff and Gershwin. I say, it's weird.

during the final runthroughs i saw more people sit on the benches at the back of the hall. wow. Yi Jing, hope your back feels better. elise, hope your stomach gets better too. Shannon, ... recover quickly.

night: some new tuition.
the teacher was kinda funny. yesterday he had 2 new students, me included, the other some person called Bambang. someone was asking him whether bambang was male or female. he said, "Why don't we wait and see?"

it turned out to be a boy. then the teacher asked him whether he was local. some girl said, "of all questions?"
he said, "why not? i have to break the ice. you can't expect me to ask him how was his e math paper, do you?"
then he turned to bambang and asked, "so, how was your emath paper?"

...


ok.
now for today.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOEL! we were wanting to throw him over to tkg field again. in the end we just wished him happy birthday.

physics was slack. Chem was hard to digest, but easy to understand. Geog elect was noisy.

after that, went to parkway. had lunch with my jie.
then we walked to the marine parade library.
went there, realised that i only brought my chem revision exercise 14.
...
so i did those that i could do without notes (which means 0.75 of the paper). then i chatted and played hp games. i was seriously bored.
i looked at my jie's chem notes and stuff.
i think it's easy to understand.
although i don't understand the terminologies.
saw one of her handwriting, "LEARN BY HARD" and i was lmao. she asked her friends and they said it was 'heart', not 'hard'. you may as well know that there were 4 of her friends, 2 which i know. Gary's handwriting is so nice! and vincent was so random. lol.
then i went to tm, to realise my piano teacher was sick. she must've smsed the wrong number. i didn't receive the message.
went back home by car.

and here i am.



~BenjaminTAN


Monday, June 2, 2008
1:58 AM

now! that quiz nearly killed me! of boredom.

now, i'll start from yesterday.

hmm. went for tuition. 9-11.
after that, went to my da gu's house for lunch and some mumbo-jumbo 2 weeks before my shawn jie's wedding. played hp games (bored lahhh), listened to music (boreddd again) and ate. loved the curry. food was catered.
memory's pretty vague, so i'm just anyhow whacking what i remembered yesterday.
after lunch, slept on the car.
when reached home, slept a bit, then studied.
dinner was bought again, never cooked or prepared at home (chicken rice was quite good)
then went online.
and played N3. fun sia. never play for so long ardy.
then went online at 9.30 i think
and chatted and chatted.
at 10.05 comp kena bad connection w internet and self-ended my conversation w elise. lol. i hope she got the message. sorry. couldn't connect again, so went to sleep.





TODAY:
ok lah
woke up at 5.30, as usual, did a lie-in till i realised i was sleeping, and woke up at 5.45. did everything that i had to do, then went out.

SLEPT ON THE DAMN BUS LAH.
had to walk from haig road down all the way to school.
reached sch at 6.50 i think
chiong a math homework.
finished half of the hw at 7.30.

lucky ms. chen didn't go through the next part of the hw.

physics was interesting.
another formula-abundant lesson, with exercises.
kangwei suddenly scolded 'mama bo lan jiao' in class.
ms goh scolded him, and asked him to meet her after class.
i then realised sean was pelting bits of eraser oh his head, hence the scolding.

during english,... it was nothing, actually.
me and andy were talking about kangwei's cursing. lol.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GENG!
i'm tired. and bored.




~BenjaminTAN


1:10 AM

ah. told her i'd do it today, so i will. have tuition later, 7.30 to 9. sianzzzzzzz.


Elise tagged me regarding some questionarre or quiz or what ever. see her blog for more info.
i'm not going to do steps 2 and 3, reason being i don't have many friends with blogs.

1: who did you last watch a movie with?
family.

2: how do you feel now?
my eng sucks. nobody actually understands my eng. so i won't explain.

3: if you can fulfil one wish, what would it be?
go back to 261092 and 're-live' my life from there on, from the NUH. Oh, with previous memories of my failures. those doctors must really learn how to deliver me properly too! okay, that's only one wish: to have everything go right from that day onwards.

4: who are you thankful to?
everybody, even those who screwed up my life big time

5: Important wishes for now
hmm. pass my CH? improve my eng? that i can sustain the studying effort for the damn O's?

6: If you can turn something in the past back, what would it be?
other than 261092, it'd be 011207. because it's just so fun and interesting. and i have an addiction.

7: What are your main priorities for now?
everything that i live for, everything that matters to me, and studies. i can't emphasize this enough.

8: what makes you happy?
hmm, isn't it obvious? i'd say that the fact that i even exist in this world is a great achievement for me. to say what i want to say in this blog, that makes me happy. if people just turn a deaf ear to what offensive things i say.

9: what do you wanna change in you?
my deviated septum, my laziness, my shortsightedness, my history of a broken arm really near the elbow, my hatred for people who i don't like at first glance, my circle of friends (widening), my....

10: What song can you represent your feeling now?
hmm. if it's classical, it'd be beethoven's first piano sonata, opus 2 no. 1, 2nd movt.
if it's romantic, it'd be brahm's first rhapsody in G minor.
if it's 20th century, it'd be ravel's sonatine's first movement.
if it's 21st century, i'd say it'd be... dunno? how to save a life? by the fray?
i have very mixed feelings now, please forgive me. i need to learn 'how to GET a LIFE', come on.

11: what kind of person you hate most?
people who are indirect in their expressions. I can't express my hatred of the notion of someone saying something offensive indirectly, and running away before you get the hidden meaning, and want to shove a mace up their pelvis. if it's a female, i hope it get's stuck there. if it's a male, i hope it inverts, and becomes SOMEWHAT like a female's. Same, i hope it gets stuck there for good. first, to remind them of their folly. second, to remind me of this great achievement.

12: is there anything you want to confess now?
no, i don't. although i have loads to say, to confess, to rant, to...

13: what is your definition of a dream house?
a house that i store my memories.

14: who will you go to when you are feeling low one day?
when i can really achieve the split personality of ranting, complaining, talking to a reactive mirror that shows nothing but me, i'd tell you. but nope, not now.

15: what do you want to achieve?
finishing this quiz/post ASAP. but you and i know that's not going to happen.

16: what age do you want to get married?
(the year when S'pore allows gay marriages)-1992. just kidding

17: would you prefer to hang out with your bf/gf/friends?
i'm not gay, neither am i attached, so i'd say my friends.

18: who made you angry for the past few days?
hmm. did i tell you i don't need someone to anger me for me to be angry?

19: what do you do when you are bored?
zi lian.

20: what is your interest?
twist people's words.
eg: my cousin's husband went to sign up on something that had an age limit. the receptionist asked, "are you 21?"
"no, i'm lewis."
another example: "what time is it now?"
"time to get a watch."

and to end it off, my own.
"I never tell the truth. True/False?"




this quiz took about 30 minutes of my life.


another one, also tagged by elise.

stating ten random facts about yourself.

1: I'm Benjamin.
2: i'm not a Tan.
3: i like eating.
4: my computer sucks. so does my memory.
5: my age gap btw jie and me is bigger than me and leinad. 1 yr 9 months, 1 yr 5 months respectively.and my jie's JC1, i'm sec 4, and my bro's sec 2.
6: i'm a right-hander, but due to some unforseen circumstances, i do just as many things with my left hand. eg: eating, playing badminton (2 hands also can), etcetc. forgot. my memory's really bad.
7: i'm buddhist.
8: i've been on the comp for about 40 mins, but i still haven't logged on in msn. stupid me.
9: i sleep on a mattress, on the floor.
10: did i tell you my memory sucks? oh well then, i'm leaving this as it is.








~BenjaminTAN


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